A Cherry-Flavored Kind of Weird: A real fake wedding cake: Part 2

Here is what I actually did. Later on, I have some suggestions and ideas that I tried and didn’t work, or thought of but didn’t try.

Materials

paste boxes (sometimes called paper mache boxes)

DAP DryDex 1-Pint Spackling with Dry Time Indicator

Joint knife (spackle spreader/putty knife)

BEHR Ultra with primer, matte sheen, unknown color

sandpaper

Kitty was not strictly necessary, but very cute

Prep work

First, I had to make the bottom-most tier. I found a box that was about 12” by 12” and used a boxcutter to cut off a ~7.5 inch depth. I had to tape some parts of it together (I used white masking tape) so I had to use spackle to cover up the joins.

The corners of the paste boxes were pretty sharp. I rounded them out by tapping them against the ground. If you do this forcefully but not too hard, the corners will squash down. You can spackle over the corners later to hide the crush marks, but I don't recommend trying this if you are only planning to paint.


before	after

Choosing the paint

Paints these days apparently have to have names like Super Ultra Premium Doubleplus Stupendous. Don't worry too much about it. The one I used had primer in it, which I think was helpful. The most important thing aside from the color is the sheen. Paints come in a range of sheens, from high gloss (very shiny) to flat (kinda cheap looking). I believe the names of the sheens vary as well, but you can ask whoever's working the paint counter what varieties you can get. The one that worked best for me was just a tiny bit shinier than dead flat (the Home Depot guy called it "matte"). At any rate, make sure to buy it in a sample size so you don't waste your money.

“Frosting”

I made a lot of mistakes, but in the end, the only things I really needed to do were spackle over each layer, sand it down, paint it, and repeat. The first layer of paint is essentially a “checkpoint.” Spackle is easy to sand, but that means that it is easy to chip and crack as well. Paint is harder to take off, so by painting over your work, you are essentially saving your changes. The first layer of paint will probably show some imperfections. If you can live with them, then congratulations, you’re done with the frosting! If not, apply a small amount of spackle to fill in the edges and holes and re-sand once it’s dry. Sand the spackle flush to the painted surface, then repaint. Don’t worry too much about small imperfections. You can cover them up with the decorations.

This part sounds easy, but it took me a couple of weeks of on-and-off work. The rest was easy by comparison.